Clyde fuck
"I like Maka but I'm not a pedophile"


Like 20, I guess







Clyde, otherwise known as the Neo-Scary Traitor, is a scythe-toting Spooksman known for his unjust conspiracies with other factions. Upon his recent feelings of homesickness after witnessing the first forming of the Frightside Clan, Clyde has since paid his debts and rejoined the clan.

Although known for being in on-and-off relationships with many different 2D characters, Clyde has Maka Albarn locked in a cage in his basement. Their relationship is surprisingly consensual.

Early Life

Clyde's birth has never been accounted for; the most popular rumor at the moment is that he was discovered in a trick-or-treating bowl in the back of a Party City. In actuality, he was a lost child from the Grim Reaper himself. Clyde had been born with a deformity; he was only born with a single wing.

Disgusted with such a horrible child, Death took him to a Party City and left him in the Halloween isle, promising to come back for him in "like, an hour or something." Death never returned, and Clyde was discovered by Negan Rotten, while the latter was shopping for fake barbed wire for his stupid baseball bat.

At age 7, Clyde was convicted for the murder of popular atheist/feminist YouTuber Steve Shives, who was found hung from a telephone pole. This act of pure assholery made Negan Rotten so proud that he completely abandoned his birth son, Dave Rotten, and considered Clyde to be his only child.

As a bonus to his reward, Negan purchased a cosplay scythe from the same Party City that Clyde was abandoned at, and introduced Clyde to hentai through lewd photos of Maka Albarn from the popular anime, "Maka Is Best Girl, Fuck Your Titty Cat Hooker."

At age 10, Clyde began to practice dark magic using his cosplay scythe. His first mastered technique was creating a handsome clone of himself, which he dubbed Grimsley the Unrelenting. This clone was later responsible for many of Clyde's inter-dimensional


Involvements in Frightside, Betraying Negan Rotten

While Clyde stayed in his own dimension to practice his dark magic, he sent his clone Grimsley on a mission of reconnaissance; he had discovered another dimension in his toilet bowl, one filled with dark magic, Pizza Pockets, and people who blast stupid fucking emo music.

Grimsley was tasked with getting to know the locals, as Clyde was quite shy (and mostly interested in getting his dick wet by traveling to where his waifu existed). Grimsley obtained even more information than Clyde had intended (the first was the discovery that the dimension had been called Frightside, and not "School Shooty Toilet Bowl Express"). He had become off-and-on friends with locals OTFree, Tommy Dickles, and Farley Sweet. He had also battled some fucking loser who ate Windex.

In episode 78, titled "Read the Manga," Grimsley had made the grave error that had led to his destruction; he was kind of a dick to Paletuna's lover, whom he admired. Okay, he was actually a huge dick. Like, super huge. Fuck that guy, man. Grimsley was soon assassinated JFK style, and Clyde vehemently went to work on a new project, dubbed "Murky."
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Clyde kidnapping Maka, drawn by some fucking retard who thinks she isn't legal

As the second bullet passed through Grimsley's head via a sniper perched on the Frightside Knoll, Clyde had completed his main mission of capturing his waifu, Maka, from her own dimension. Maka was surprisingly happy with leaving her shitty dimension, and had no issue with being locked up in Clyde's basement. Now content with being a self-proclaimed Spooksman, Clyde traveled through many different, retarded dimensions, once of which being the Lazytown Dimension, where he ran into his half-brother, Dave Rotten, who worked for billionaire womanizer Robbie Rotten. Dave spilled the beans on their father's abandonment of him, and revealed an even more shitty secret: Negan Rotten had been a Spooksman all along, something that Dave Rotten was incapable of even grasping due to his penis size. As it turns out, Negan purchased the cosplay scythe for Clyde for the sole purpose of assisting him in his plan of taking revenge out on Robbie Rotten for his involvement with cancer (this was a misunderstanding, as cancer had actually been in cahoots with Cad Bane, but that's another story).

Clyde slices Negan Rotten's throat, probably not killing him (Circa 1967)

Clyde, intent on not being a fucking dickwad to his friends anymore (for the sake of the timeline and flow of this garbage let's say Discord and Skype was just Grimsley being an assoholic bitch), traveled home to confront Negan Rotten. After a speech mirroring that of General Krell (you know, from the Clone Wars?) ...

Okay, so he had like, four arms, and was racist towards clones, and was like "fuck your clone shit man, that's treason!" You know what, he's not even canon, fuck him. moving on.

So yeah, Clyde was pretty pissed that Negan Rotten had been using him. That's not tubular, at all. They got into a huge argument, with Negan Rotten calling Clyde a pedophile. In anger, Clyde sliced his throat with his cosplay scythe, causing him to lose consciousness and fall to the ground. Clyde created one more portal, and fled to Frightside... but not before destroying Negan Rotten's scythe.

Powers and Abilities

Scythe Chat Teleportation: Using his Weeb Scythe, Clyde is capable of creating dark portals (about as dark as PoliceBrutality) that allow him to enter other chat applications including Discord and Skype. These applications were used when concocting his traitorous deeds.