The Randi Cotton Candy Saga refers to the events between Sex Hex Maniac and Randi, occurring anywhere from the span of June - September 2014(?).

Randi Cotton Candy Saga
Attack on Autism
Vital statistics
Participants Sex Hex Maniac, Randi
Date June 15th, 2014 - September, 2014 (?)
Location Facebook


Back when the Sex Hex Maniac page was in it's infancy, she received a private message from someone going by the name of "Randi". In the beginning, Randi seemed to have a calm demeanor and asked if he could admin the page. After politely declining his offer, the manchild then began to incessantly flood Ellen's inbox with lewd Pokemon images.

This trend continued for the next few weeks. It became typical for Randi to message her throughout the day (despite how obvious it was that she wasn't interested in carrying a conversation). Eventually, the creature began to exhibit a distinct, creepy behavior. He would turn any chat sexual, no matter how one-sided his affection for an autistic minor was.

Although Ellen would kindly dodge the topic on numerous occasions, she surprisingly didn't share the same desires as the pedophile. It got to the point in which, it seemed that Ellen had began to intentionally ignore Randi on any given day. For a while, the boy began to simmer down and started to message her less and less. For a while, all was well in the Sex Hex Kingdom...

However, this ultimately led to Randi's (now notorious) meltdowns. A Randi meltdown consists of the following; a) Blaming Ellen for his stupid-ass behavior, b) Suicidal Threats, c) Making edgy statuses, making use of song lyrics, and d) Calling Ellen Retarded.

Despite all of this, Randi still believed in his feeble mind that he could make a relationship between her and Ellen work. Thus, he immediately forked over all of his vital personal information, consisting of (but not limited to) his personal phone number, his land-line number, his email, his address and even some questionable photos.

In time, Ellen's negligence had taken a toll on Randi's mental health (or lack therefore of). However, Ellen had a devious plan up her sleeve. Using her deceptive skills (aka, blatant over the keyboard lying), she managed to convince Randi that her page was hacked by Egoraptor. Having the tiny brain that a Randi would have, he not only believed this, but even supported the alleged hacker for his efforts.

By the 3rd time Ellen was hacked that week, Randi had finally let his tard rage get the better of him, and proceeded to unleash his ultimate teen angst against her offender. Shortly after breaking down and yelling at her inbox, Randi terminated his own Facebook account, presumably to never interact with Sex Hex Maniac any time soon.

Sequence of Events

(The following is a break-down of the key-events, in chronological order:)

  • Ellen creates the Sex Hex Maniac page on Facebook in September.
    • A few days in, Randi messages the page directly in private messaging.
      • First contact with the creature is established.
  • Randi begins to send Ellen excessive lewd imagery.
    • After constant sexual harassment, Ellen begins to distance herself from the pedophile.
      • Randi takes a break from pursuing Ellen.
  • Randi gives Ellen his personal information (i.e. Phone #, Address etc.)
    • Has his first mental breakdown around this time.
  • Ellen puts her plan into action.
    • Pretends that her account got hacked in order to avoid Randi.
      • Randi (like a moron) takes the bait.
        • Randi eventually gives up on his pursuit of love.
          • Randi closes his account.


  • Did you know that Randi tries to lure little girls out to his house in Michigan, using nothing but his pedo glasses and beef jerky?
  • That he's a big fan of Egoraptor?
  • Randi's supposed cure for autism, is to ignore it.
  • Randi thinks it's totally not weird to send pictures of himself shirtless to an underage girl, lit by nothing other than his laptop screen.


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