Jesus Soos Christ
"Hey little dude, wanna go kick some pre-schoolers?"



Soos is Gravity Fall's local serial killer. He has the world record of Skyward Sword Any% Soos run where he just smashes the disk on camera. He is best friends with Ging but not really because it's actually Prince Baka.


Soos has a sadistic personality. He honestly gets off to watching people suffer under his own actions. Soos will typically toy with the locals by poisoning their water or just fuckin' killing them. What the fuck.


As Soos was birthed, immediately stabbed his doctor with the pocket knife god gave him because be smacked him on the ass. He later walked out of the hospital to go chop down some trees to test his abilities. He thought it was pretty cool so he built a house, only living off of the berries in the bush. Several years later, Grunkle Stan showed up and thought he was a retard living alone in the woods. So Soos took advantage of this because he was tired of paying for food and tricked Stan into thinking he was retarded.

Eventually, Soos and Stan opened up a tourist trap called "The Mystery Shack" thanks to Gravity Falls having a huge fanbase. They sold illegal bootleg Disney merchandise for profit. Eventually like, two kids show up and uuhh he kills one of them? I don't know I never watched the show. Soos just told me to make this article or he'd kill me.


  • He DOES NOT wear diapers.

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